


1+1≠3

by lazypookagirl



Series: I don't know what to title this... [1]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU
Genre: Alpha!Jason, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, M/M, Mpreg, omega!dick
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-01
Updated: 2017-06-03
Packaged: 2018-06-05 09:27:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 8
Words: 17,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6699340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lazypookagirl/pseuds/lazypookagirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Things seem okay between Dick and Jason (is that love in the air?). Sure, they keep their relationship a secret. And sure, Dick might have forgotten to take his birth control pills during his heat. But things would work out okay for them, right?<br/>Dick soon learns that 1+1 does not equal 3.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Dick Grayson got his first heat when he was 14 years old while he was on patrol. It sucked. It started with a slight headache but he just ignored it and kept racing on the rooftops after Bruce. Soon he started to cramp. And then came that flame that burned him from the inside. The hot pain put an end to finishing patrol. Dick needed to get home and fast. The law didn't have anything against an alpha coming along to help a poor omega in heat. And the legal age was whenever an omega had their first heat and whenever an alpha had their first rut. Technically anyone could have come along to fuck the boy wonder. But no matter what the law said, Bruce was one of the few alphas who believed that it would be rape. Dick was still so young and not able to willingly give consent with a clear mind. Lucky for Dick, Bruce was able to quickly get them both home before any alpha caught a whiff of Dick's heavenly scent.

As soon as they got back to the Manor, Bruce passed the moaning boy over to Alfred and left as quickly as he arrived. Even being Dick's father figure, the pheromones affected Bruce more than he would like to admit. He knew leaving Dick with Alfred would be the best choice since Alfred was a beta and therefore would be unaffected by Dick's alluring scent. Alfred took Dick to his room and left him with food and water. 

Dick was alone for three days to writhe in a pain that would only disappear with an alpha's knot inside him. He was left to moan and beg for a nonexistent alpha to fill him up. It was humiliating how powerless he had become. The boy who stopped criminals every night with Batman was suddenly stuck in a bed crying from how oversensitive his body had become. Dick had the longest days of his life and so did Bruce. While the boy was moaning in pain all Bruce could do was stay as far away from Dick's room as possible. He spent the 72 hours worried about his son and unable to do anything to help.

When Dick finally left his room it was with dripping hair from a quick shower and dark bags under his eyes. He looked like he had been through hell and who was to say he hadn't?

* * *

Dick stated dating Barbara Gordon soon after his first heat. She was an alpha and was able to help him through his heats. They lasted for a few years until they broke it off. Dick was single again and back to dealing with his heats alone. Suppressants could only help so much.

Leaving Robin behind him, Dick became Nightwing and left for Bludhaven. Soon after Bruce took another boy under his wing to become Robin. Dick met the kid a couple times but not enough to really get close to him. Well not until the day they beat the crap out of one another.

Dick was just stopping by the manor to confer with Bruce about a case from Bludhaven. After being greeted by Alfred he was informed that Bruce wasn't home, but Jason was. So Dick decided to wait around for Bruce to get back. To pass the time he decided to see what Jason was up to. He walked down to the cave to find Jason training hard. The 15 year old was drenched in sweat but kept hitting the punching bag.

"Are you up for sparring?" Dick asked. Jason gasped and quickly turned around, his eyes wide. Dick laughed causing Jason to send him a glare. "Sorry, didn't think it would be that easy to sneak up on Robin." Jason huffed and turned back to hit the punching bag once more. Dick sighed. "Hey you never answered my question. You wanna spar?" Jason turned around once more, this time with one eyebrow raised. 

"You for real?" he asked.

"Ya, I mean if you're up for it." Jason gave a small smile.

"Let's see how fast I can kick your ass."

"Language." Jason just rolled his eyes and moved over to the mat. 

They both stood a few feet apart facing each other. Quick nods signaled the start of the match and both guys went at it. Dick quickly realized how different their fighting styles were. While Dick was more agile and moved around quickly to avoid any hits, Jason went right for Dick. Jason relied more on the power of his punch than evasive maneuvers. 

Jason tried to throw a punch, but Dick was too fast and was easily able to avoid being hit. Jason kept trying to get a hit in and while he could probably have knocked out any kid his age, Dick had had more training. Dick was able to quickly move at just the right time and then get a hit in on Jason. And boy did that piss off Jason. Every miss just caused Jason's anger level to spike. He was soon putting more power behind his punches. Letting his anger influence his fighting choices only made things harder for the boy. While his punches were stronger, they were sloppy and Dick was easily able to avoid every single one. Both guys were panting and Jason ached from Dick getting hits in. Dick ended their sparring match by getting close enough to Jason to kick his legs out from under him. Jason slammed onto the ground. Dick help out a hand to help Jason up, but the younger boy ignored the hand and pushed himself up. Dick dropped his hand down back to his side.

"Sorr-"

"Again," interrupted Jason.

"What?"

"Let's go again."

"How about a couple pointers first."

"Don't let my anger control me, I know. Bruce has told me already," Jason said sharply with his arms crossed and a scowl on his face.

"I was going to say that putting so much energy into every punch is going to tire you out when I can easily avoid them. Don't go straight for me; wait for me to come after you." Okay, so he lied. He really was just going to say that kid followed his anger too much. Seeing the tension leave Jason's shoulders made Dick realize it was a good choice to pick something else to critique. 

"Oh." Jason uncrossed his arms. "So can we spar again?"

And that's how Bruce found his two sons when he got home. They were beating the crap out of each other, both out of breath and over exhausted, but they had smiles on their faces.

* * *

 A few weeks later found Jason and Dick sitting next to each other watching some horror movie marathon. Ever since the day they had sparred they began to hang out more. Dick was the manor more often offering to spar or to just watch TV. Bruce and Alfred were glad the boys were getting along so well. Dick was happy to hang out with his little brother and Jason absolutely loved spending time Dick.

Currently they weren't touching each other, but there was very little space between their thighs. Jason had a bowl of popcorn (extra butter of course) sitting on his lap and every once in a while Dick would reach over and grab a handful. Both boys had their eyes glued to the screen as the murderer broke into a girl's bedroom. Right as the masked man was about to stab the girl Jason started to fidget. His skin started to itch all over and it was hard for him to sit still. That caught Dick's attention.

"You okay?" Dick asked, words slightly mumbled since he had just stuffed his face with a handful of popcorn. Instead of looking intently at the TV screen he now was looking Jason with his eyebrows scrunched together.

"Ya. I'm fine," Jason said slightly embarrassed. He didn't know what was wrong but the feeling just wouldn't go away. Dick looked uncertain but turned his gaze back to the TV to see the girl now in a puddle of blood.

The murderer went after the other people in the house, but Jason couldn't focus on what was going on. His skin was still itchy and he was starting to get a headache. Then much to his embarrassment Jason started to get a boner. Luckily he had a bowl of popcorn to hide it. He was glad it was so dark in the room so Dick couldn't see the dark shade of crimson his cheeks were becoming. He tried hard to get the erection go down, but if anything it just got worse. His heart started racing so he tried to take a deep breathe in through his nose, but that only made his predicament worse. A heavenly scent made it's way to Jason's nose making his boner about ten times harder. It was extremely uncomfortable and deepened the color of his cheeks. What the heck was going on with him?

As if noticing Jason's discomfort, Dick turned from the TV to give Jason a look over. That only made Jason's cheeks become ten shades darker. "Are you sure you're okay?"

Jason's "Ya, still fine," came out strained. Dick frowned and sniffed the air. Instantly Dick sprang up from the couch startling Jason. The older boy had his arm covering his nose and his eyes were wide. 

"I need to go and you need to find Alfred," Dick said, his words muffled.

"Wha-?" Jason tried to ask, but Dick cut him off.

"I'm pretty sure you're going into a rut. I need to go. I'll send Alfred down if I see him." And with that Dick was gone leaving Jason alone and mortified.

Dick must have run into Alfred since after only a few minutes the butler was there to help Jason get to his room. Jason an alpha? The thought made his head spin. Alphas would have there first rut (and omegas were have their first heat) anywhere from 14-18 years old. Jason was sure that he would end up not going through either and end up as a beta like his mother was. Guess he thought wrong. A small smile appeared on his lips as he realized that it made him more like Bruce. Now Jason could be a strong alpha just like Bruce. 

The smile quickly disappeared when he remembered he got a boner in the presence of his older brother. All he could think of was the amazing scent he got a whiff of when with Dick. Try as he might, he could not get Dick out his head the whole time he was in rut.

* * *

Jason learned that ruts suck. He had an erection for almost the whole time he was in rut. It was uncomfortable and extremely humiliating knowing that Alfred, Bruce, and Dick all knew that he spent a couple days locked in his room masturbating. Just thinking about it made him blush.

But now Jason had recovered and survived a whole day of school. He was waiting outside for Alfred to pick him up and was surprised to find that it was Dick in the black car. Jason quickly got into the passenger seat, already blushing because of their last encounter and from who he pictured during his rut. 

"Hey, how's it going Little Wing?" Jason raised an eyebrow at the nickname, but didn't comment on it.

"Good." He kept his answer short and simple.

"Well I had to stop by the manor to meet with Bruce. It went faster than expected so I thought I could give Alfred a break and pick you up." Dick's glance left the road for a few seconds to look at Jason before he went back to focusing on driving. "We don't have to go straight back to the manor. You up for some ice cream?"

As if Jason was going to turn down ice cream. "Sounds good to me." That answer brought a smile to Dick's lips and flips to Jason's stomach. 

 _Stop! He is your BIG BROTHER!_ Jason screamed at himself.  _You are just thinking these thoughts because you were unlucky enough to catch his scent while you were in rut. Thats it. Right?_

The sound of the car door opening brought Jason back to reality. Jason quickly slipped out of the car and ran up to Dick. They walked into a little ice cream shop that had a sweet looking old lady behind the register.

"Well if it isn't Richard. How long has it been since you've been here?" The lady behind the counter said to Dick.

He let out a laugh before answering with "Too long, Mrs. Baker."

"Way too long if you ask me. It seems like its been ages since I've seen you around. And who did you bring with you?"

Dick turned to look at Jason who had been standing a couple steps back from Dick. "This is my brother Jason."

"Well, Jason, it's nice to meet you. I'm Mrs. Baker but feel free to call me Nancy." Nancy reached her hand out and Jason walked a few steps forward so he could shake her hand.

"It's nice to meet you, too." Their hands dropped and Nancy turned her attention back to Dick.

"I'm assuming you want your usual." Nancy asked with an amused smile on her face.

"Well of course. That is, if you still remember it," Dick said smiling right back.

"Like I could forget a crazy combination like yours." Turning to Jason she asked, "And what would you like, dear?"

"Just a scoop of chocolate please," Jason answered. Dick let out a gasp and brought his hand to his heart. 

"Just chocolate. _Just chocolate_. How dare you disrespect ice cream like that. Mrs. Baker just give him the same as me." Nancy gave an amused smile and turned away from the register to get their order ready.

Dick turned his head away from Jason and crossed his arms, acting like he was upset. "Just chocolate," he mumbled under his breath. Jason was going to say something, but Nancy came back with two giant ice cream cones. Jason's jaw dropped as he saw what was on it. Dick payed, grabbed the ice cream cones, and handed one out to Jason. The younger boy took his ice cream but was still shocked to find what all Dick put on his ice cream. How was he not fat? There was a chocolate and vanilla swirl covered in chunks of brownie, m+m's, sprinkles, Reece Pieces, crushed Oreo bits, and, of course, a cherry on top.

"I expect to see you back soon, Richard. And bring Jason along, too!" Nancy shouted as the boys walked out of the ice cream shop.

"I promise I will!" Dick shouted back. 

They made their way to a bench that was just outside the ice cream shop. Dick had already made a huge dent in his ice cream. Jason was taking his time savoring the best ice cream he had ever had. He was glad that Dick refused to let him have just plain chocolate ice cream.

"So how many times have you been there for Mrs. Baker to know your order?" Jason asked.

"Way too many times," Dick said with a chuckle.

They went back to eating the delicious ice cream. Soon both ice creams cones were gone and they went back to the car. Dick reached his hands to turn the keys and start the engine, but he changed his mind and brought his hand back to his side. He shifted to face Jason.

"So how was umm...well how was the last few days?" Dick asked. Jason shifted uncomfortably in his seat and refused to meet Dick's gaze.

"Fine," was his short response.

"I'm sorry for leaving so fast but I was afraid things would get out of hand if I had stayed." Jason didn't respond so Dick kept talking. "I had my first heat on patrol." That made Jason look up to meet Dick's gaze. To have a heat on patrol? That must have sucked.

Dick ran a hand through his hair as he kept talking. "It was pretty awkward. Bruce threw me in the Batmobile and just dropped me into Alfred's arms before he left.  Can't say I blame him; the scent of an omega in heat must've really affected him. That's why I left so fast. I didn't want my scent affecting you-"  _too late,_ Jason thought "-and I didn't want to do anything to you either."

Jason nodded. "I understand why you left. It's fine." Dick let out a breath and smiled.

"Okay, good."

"But just to let you know I wouldn't have cared if you had stayed." Jason blushed and looked away. Why would he say that?! Dick's eyes were wide and his mouth was open. He blinked a couple times while processing what Jason said. "Just forget I said anything," Jason said, still refusing to look at Dick.

"Hey, look at me." Jason complied and looked right into Dick's eyes. His cheeks were still a flaming red. "Anyone in rut or in heat has no power over their actions. They can't give consent in that time. I wouldn't have taken advantage of you like that. Don't think I wouldn't have gladly done anything with you. That's why I had to leave. I don't think I would've have the strength to say no is you asked for anything." 

Now it was Jason's turn to look surprised. Did this mean Dick liked him? Letting his emotions guide him once again, Jason leaned over and kissed Dick. When Dick didn't kiss him back, Jason pulled back, his heart pounding and his cheeks flushed. Dick was back to looking like a deer in headlights but quickly shook himself out of the stupor. And then Dick crashed his lips against Jason's.

The kiss wasn't soft and slow. It was rough, each person trying to dominate. Dick moved his hands on either side of Jason's face. Jason leaned more towards Dick and tangled his hands in the older boys hair. The bruising kiss barely lasted a minute and then they broke apart, both panting. Dick smiled and then so did Jason. They didn't know where this would go from there, but one step at a time, right?

* * *

 The next few weeks were spent with Dick and Jason hanging out and making out. They weren't necessarily "dating" but they were getting closer to each other. Of course, Bruce and Alfred didn't know (or maybe Alfred did. Alfred knows everything) so Dick and Jason could only steal a quick kiss here or there. They mainly spent time hanging out like they did before their first kiss. They sparred, watched TV, and even went back to the ice cream shop a couple times. Things were going good between the two of them. 

One day out of the blue Dick offered Jason to come and patrol with him in Bludhaven. Of course Jason jumped on that offer and just a few nights later they found themselves taking out criminals together. Honestly, nothing big was going on the night they patrolled. They caught a couple dealers and stopped a bank robbery, but other than that nothing major happened. 

It was about 3 a.m. and the chill in the air was starting to get to Jason. Him and Dick were just observing the city from the roof of a skyscraper. Nothing was happening and Jason was getting bored. So of course, Dick had to put an end to that. 

Jason was just spacing out, staring at the cars zooming around when Dick poked him hard in the arm. "Ow! What was that for?" Jason shouted.

"Tag, you're it!" And Dick was gone, leaving Jason alone on the rooftop.  _Was Dick being serious? He wanted to play_ tag _?_ Jason asked himself.

Jason's eyes narrowed and he took off running after Dick. Buildings blurred in Jason's vision as he zeroed in on Dick. The blue of the Nightwing suit was the only thing that Jason could see in the dark. He focused on that and ran as fast as his feet could carry him. After about 20 minutes Jason realized that Dick was nowhere in sight. He huffed and glanced around him, trying to catch any glimpse of Nightwing. He had given up when his hand was grabbed from behind. Jason turned around ready to punch whoever had dared to touch him but let his fist drop when he saw it was Dick. 

Dick's cheeks were flushed from the cold air, and Jason was sure his were too. There was a smirk on Dick's face when he spoke.

"You just couldn't catch me, could you?" Jason huffed in response and Dick laughed. To shut him up, Jason stood up on his tip toes and grabbed Dick's face to bring the older boy down to his level. Jason smashed his lips against Dick's and Dick grabbed fistfuls of Jason's hair. This kiss was like their first one. It was rough and full of power. Dick bit Jason's bottom lip causing his to moan. Jason's cheeks became a darker red, not that Dick could see them. Dick used Jason's moan to give him access to him mouth and quickly slipped his tongue in. After a couple minutes Jason pulled back with a sinister smile on his face.

"Tag, you're it," he said and then raced off just like Dick had done earlier. Dick smiled and shook his head before racing after the younger boy.

* * *

 It wasn't long before Dick wanted to figure out what the relationship between the two of them should be. So Dick took Jason to lunch one Sunday. They went to a small little diner. After they had received their food Dick decided to ask about what had been on his mind.

"What are we?"

"What?" Jason asked, confused.

"What is this?" Dick asked gesturing between them.

"Oh," was all Jason said. 

"Do you want this to be something?" Jason started to shift uncomfortably in his seat. This is not how he thought lunch with Dick would go. Sure, Jason had thought about this, but he had never really come up with an answer. He liked Dick, like really, really liked Dick. But did Dick feel the same way? He usually stopped thinking about it after that.

"Do you?" Jason asked. All he got in reply was a loud sigh from Dick. Jason's stomach turned and his heart stopped.

"Jay. I'm _three years_ older than you. I'm an adult and you're not even 16-"

"So? Who cares if I'm 15 and you're 18? I can still make my own decisions."

"And we're brothers..."

"Not by blood."

"No, but-"

"If you want to end this then just say so," Jason spit out.

"No! Little Wing, that's not it! I just don't want to be taking advantage of you."

"Trust me, Dick. You're not."

"You are for sure okay with us?" Dick asked sincerely.

"Definitely." Dick broke out with one of his contagious smiles. 

"Then, Jason Todd, would you give me the honor of being your boyfriend?" 

Jason rolled his eyes, but had a huge smile on his face when he replied with "Yes, you idiot."

* * *

 The following months were filled with dates and many, many make out sessions. They went from first base, to second, to third, and were talking about going all the way. Jason liked the pace they were going. Dick always made sure that Jason was comfortable with what they were doing. Jason always rolled his eyes and assured Dick he was fine. It seemed almost like a reversal of roles. Sure Dick was the oldest, but he was an omega and Jason was an alpha. Jason knew that he was being foolish; being an omega didn't automatically mean Dick had to act submissive, but Jason would have liked to be able to prove that he could take care of Dick like Dick had been doing with Jason.

To try and prove to Dick that he cared, Jason got Dick to come over to the manor. It was about one in the afternoon. Bruce was still at Wayne Enterprises and Alfred was out running errands. It was perfect. So Jason cleaned his whole room and made sure to change his bed sheets along with making the bed. Jason had gotten a couple candles and lit them making his room smell amazing (yet of course, nothing compared to Dick's natural scent). Then Jason double checked that he had put the box of condoms in the drawer of his nightstand. Everything was ready when he got a text from Dick asking where he was. Jason replied saying he was in his room. He took a a deep breath to calm his nerves as he waited for Dick to get there.

Dick swung the door open and his jaw dropped when he saw Jason's room. Jason gave a nervous smile and rubbed his arms, turning his head to avoid looking Dick. Neither person said anything, but Dick walked forward until he was close enough to Jason to pull him into a kiss. Unlike most of their other kisses, this one was actually slow. It was passionate and full of raw emotion. Neither boy was trying to dominate the kiss, they both just showed their love for one another in the gentle kiss. The kiss ended with Jason pulling away to talk to Dick.

"Bruce and Alfred aren't here so I was thinking..." Jason blushed but kept his gaze locked on Dick's. Dick answered by grabbing Jason to kiss him again.

Soon Dick was laying on his back in the middle of the bed with Jason between his legs pulling off his lover's boxers. Once both of them were completely naked, Jason leaned down to kiss Dick on the lips. It only lasted a couple seconds before Jason pulled away so that he could grab a condom from his nightstand. It took a couple tries for Jason to get the condom on, much to his embarrassment, but Dick just laughed and tried his best to make Jason feel more comfortable.

Dick had had sex before. Jason knew. They had talked about it. And they were both ready to fuck. So after prepping Dick, Jason moved so that the tip of his penis was at Dick's hole.

"You sure?" Jason asked. 

Dick smiled and answered with a "Yes."

And they spent the afternoon learning every inch of the other one's body. After both had reached their climax, they lied next to each other, panting. They both had a smile of their face and dozed off in each other's arms. Soon Dick got up to shower so he could leave before Bruce or Alfred came back and Jason cleaned up his room. With a farewell kiss, Dick went back to Bludhaven leaving Jason to try to plan the next time he could get the manor to himself.

* * *

Within a month Jason and Dick had fucked about five more times. It was the end of June and Dick's heat was coming up. Now the came the big question of whether or not he wanted to share his heat with Jason. Sure, he trusted his lover, but were they ready to move their relationship to the next level? 

Apparently they were because two days later found the both of them in Dick's apartment in Bludhaven. The AC was cranked all the way up to try to beat the heat. Outside it was almost 100 degrees Fahrenheit. And it was worse for Dick since his heat made his skin burn. Of course the only way for Jason to help Dick was to knot inside of him. And condoms didn't help because to really cool off Dick's heat, he needed Jason's cum filling him up. 

So Dick remembered to take his birth control pill before his heat started. Didn't he? And he told Jason about giving him the birth control pill every morning, right? Dick almost stopped the blow job he was receiving to tell Jason about the pill when Jason also stuck a finger into Dick's already very wet hole. Dick moaned and was lost to his heat and the feeling on Jason's mouth on his dick. 

Oh well. What were the odds of getting pregnant after sharing a heat for the first time anyway?


	2. Chapter 2

It had been a few weeks since Dick had shared his heat with Jason. They had been talking about whether or not to tell Bruce. Dick wanted to let Bruce know about how he was seeing Jason, but Jason was scared shitless about what Bruce would do if he knew. So they kept pushing off telling him to the point of it being too late.

Dick was sent on an off world mission. He wasn’t quite sure how long he would be away, but he was sure it would be a while. Jason and Dick decided to talk to Bruce once Dick got back to Earth. And with that they said they’re good-byes and Dick left home.

Everything was going well until about two weeks into the mission. The foods he usually enjoyed now smelled off. Some scents caused him to become very nauseous. And on top of that he was up early almost every morning just to rush to the toilet and get rid of everything he had eaten the night before. Dick was sore, moody, and just wanted to be able to stop puking.

He tried to tell himself that it was just being on another planet that had his body so wrecked. But try as he might to ignore it, there was always that voice in his head that said what if you’re pregnant?

But he couldn’t possibly be knocked up…right? Dick just pushed the thought away and focused on the mission at hand. He could figure out what was wrong when he got back to Earth. Back to Jason.

* * *

Jason had been having a hard time, too. With Dick gone he focused more on his role as Robin. He trained harder and went on patrol more often. He missed Dick so he tried to put all his attention on being a vigilante to help him forget about Dick’s smile, or his laugh. He tried not to think about Dick’s soft lips or the noise he makes when Jason tugs on his hair during sex. Jason would just shake his head and move. Dick would be back soon.

But not soon enough.

Jason got word that his mother might still be alive. His mother. So he hunted down any piece of information he could get until he found her. His real mom was in his arms and everything seemed right in the world.

That is, until Joker walked into the picture.

Jason was powerless as Joker took matters into his own hands. The Joker beat Jason with a crowbar and tortured the poor boy. And to make the already shitty situation more fucked up, Jason’s birth mother was in on it. She had sold Jason out to the Joker.

Jason’s hope of getting to know his mother was destroyed. And his (hopefully-soon-to-be-) mate was on some other planet. But maybe Bruce would find him? Save him from the red numbers counting down to zero.

But Bruce didn’t get there in time. The bomb exploded and ended the life of the second boy wonder. Bruce was crushed. He almost crossed his line of morals by killing the Joker. But instead Joker went back to Arkham.

And poor Jason was buried. Dick didn’t go to the funeral. The first Robin didn’t even know his lover had died. Guess Bruce had decided Dick’s mission was more important than Dick being able to mourn with the rest of the family over Jason’s death.

And poor Dick was still thinking that he might be carrying a baby. Jason’s baby. His heart ached as he thought about Jason’s smirk, his calloused hands that felt heavenly against the older boys skin, and the way Jason would whisper sweet nothings to him when they lied together after sex.

But Dick would never be able to experience any of those things again.

* * *

The first thing Dick does when he gets back to Earth is head straight for the Manor. He expects for everyone to be happy to see him back. Dick just pictures the kiss he’s going to get from Jason. The thought of Jason’s lips against his makes a smile form on Dick’s face, but it’s short lived.

As soon as Dick steps in the front door and sees Alfred’s somber face, he knows somethings wrong. Alfred points Dick to the direction of Bruce’s office.

Dick heads in that direction, slightly shaken. Where was his welcome him kiss?

It seemed to Dick like all the warmth had been sucked out of the Manor. Instead there being life and love there was only death and darkness. And for some reason it was extremely cold. Dick used that as an excuse for why he was shaking. But he knew the real reason; he knew in his gut that something awful must have happened while he was gone.

The walk to Bruce’s office seems extraordinarily long. The Manor was eerily quiet, the only sound being Dick’s footsteps against the hard wood floor. Dick glanced around trying to figure out what the fuck was going on. The usually bright and lively home now seemed dull, dark, and dead. There was no smirking Jason running up to Dick and pulling him into a deep kiss. There was only a feeling of dread in Dick’s stomach.

Dick swallowed before turning the door knob to the office. The door creaked open, creating an echo that broke the dead silence. He stepped into the room to see Bruce sitting at his desk. He had his elbows resting on the desk with his face in his hands. On the desk was a couple empty bottles of liquor, not a drop left in any of them. When Dick made it to Bruce's desk, Bruce ran his hands down his face and let out a long sigh. 

And then Dick knew something really was wrong. Bruce's clothes were wrinkled with the buttons of his shirt not matching up correctly. His hair was greasy, longer than Dick had seen it in a long time, and has pieces sticking up in every possible direction. Bruce's eyes were bloodshot and underlined by dark purple circles. To Dick, Bruce's eyes looked dead.

"Dick." Bruce broke the silence. 

Dick swallowed and shifted uncomfortably. After a few moments he was able to get out his own greeting. "Bruce."

"Dick, Jason is...he..." but Bruce couldn't finish the sentence. And that spoke louder than anything Bruce could attempt to say. Bruce was the master of staying composed. He was always able to keep a straight face and move on. But now...

Bruce's face crumpled. And while he didn't shed a tear, Dick was still surprised at the amount of emotion he could see on Bruce's face. He could see the exhaustion, sadness, and remorse that Bruce was currently feeling. Bruce never showed any type of emotion so for Dick to see Bruce at a moment like this he knew something terrible had happened while he was away. And suddenly Dick realized what had happened.

"No," Dick said hoarsely. He slowly started to sink into a chair, his while body shaking. "Please, Bruce...no," he whimpered. Dick could feel the tears forming in his eyes, blurring his vision. He felt them when they broke loose, leaving trails of warmth down his cheeks.

"I'm so sorry." Dick knew Bruce meant it. He could hear how sincere Bruce was. But that didn't make everything okay.

"When." It came out as more of a demand than a question.

"A few weeks ago." With that response Dick went from being crushed to being crushed and pissed. And that is not a good combination. 

"A few..." Dick's hand clenched into fists and he sent a glare to Bruce. "A few weeks! Why the fuck did you not tell me?!"

"You were on a mission. I didn't want to mes-"

"You didn't want me to mess up my mission!" Dick was standing up. His whole body was shaking uncontrollably, but this time it wasn't from fear of what had happened while he was away. Now it was from the red hot rage that was flowing through his veins.

"Dick, I just didn't want-"

"No, Bruce!" Nothing he said would make Dick forgive him for not telling him that Jason had di-was gone. "This isn't about what you wanted Bruce! I had a right to now! You should have told me. I don't give a shit about if the mission would have gotten messed up!" His breath was now coming out it pants, but Dick didn't want to stop. He needed Bruce to realize how dense he was being.

"I just thought-" But Bruce was still unable to get out a full sentence since Dick was still needing Bruce to listen.

"Do you know I love him?"  _Or I guess loved,_ Dick thought. He just pushed that saddening thought away and continued on with his rant. "And not as a brother. No. As a _mate_ , Bruce. We were going to tell you when I got back to Earth, but I guess that won't be happening now."  _Or ever._

Bruce was stunned. His sons were...lovers? No. He couldn't have missed something like that. Or could he have? And now knowing that his first son's mate was dead...

Dick slowly lowered himself back into his seat. Most of his anger was gone, having gotten rid of it by shouting at Bruce. Now Dick was left feeling numb. He would never see Jason's beautiful smile. Or his sly little smirk. He would never be able to run his hands through Jason's silky black hair. Dick could never trace his fingers over Jason's many scars or even touch the smooth skin. Never again would Dick hear Jason whisper his lover's name. Dick would never hear the moans that came from Jason when they made love. They would never be able to go out and get ice cream. Alfred would never find them cuddling on the couch making fun of some crappy movie. Dick would never be able to calm himself down by breathing in Jason's heavenly scent. He would never be able to do anything with Jason every again.

Suddenly Dick felt very nauseous. He could feel the bile rising up his throat, but he swallowed it back down. And then a scary thought crossed his mind.

He could be pregnant with his dead boyfriend's baby.

* * *

Dick tore out of the driveway going over double the speed limit. Laws be damned, he needed to get to a store and fast. Yet he had to be smart about this. Any nearby store would most likely have people who would recognize his as Bruce’s ward and he couldn’t have that happen. At least not when he was buying a certain something that was very private.

What if Dick is pregnant?

He would be having Jason’s baby. The baby would grow up never knowing his father and Jason would never be able to hold his child in his arms. Hell, Jason would never even get to know that Dick was pregnant. And what would Jason even think of a baby? Dick was an adult, but Jason is-was so young. Would he have even wanted Dick to keep the baby.

Dick shook his head. What did it matter anyway? Dick’s other half was dead and rotting in the ground. He just needed to focus on the now. Focus on the possibility of having a baby.

What if Dick isn’t pregnant?

Part of Dick thought that it would be a relief. He wouldn’t be a single parent and he would be able to wait until he was older to have a kid. Yet the bigger part of him felt his heart break into a million pieces. If he wasn’t pregnant than that means there would be nothing left of Jason. Having Jason’s baby would mean that there would be a mini Jason. And that thought brought the smallest of smiles to Dick’s tear stained face.

Before he knew it, Dick was four cities over and parked in front of a small store. Luckily for Dick, the store was still open. With is being pitch black outside now, not many stores were still open.

So with one deep breathe, Dick used his last ounce of courage and got out of the car. He walked into the small store and made his way over to the pregnancy tests. He bought one package from each brand and went to checkout.

The cashier’s eyebrows rose and his eyes widened when he saw six boxes of pregnancy tests, but he kept his mouth shut which Dick was grateful for. He was sure he looked like mess with blood short puffy eyes, pale skin, and dirty clothes. But the cashier made no comment and quickly rang up all the pregnancy tests. Dick dropped a couple bills (were they tens, twenties? who knows, Dick didn’t care anymore), grabbed the bag of pregnancy tests, said “keep the change,” and then proceeded to walk out.

From there Dick ended up finding himself checked into a motel and sitting on the cold tile of a bathroom floor. He had about 5 now empty cups from when he tried to chug as much water as humanly possible. And then he peed on every single one of those fucking sticks.

He sat with his eyes squeezed shut, waiting for the alarm on his phone to go off so he could see the results. When he heard the buzz he took a deep breath and opened his eyes. Instantly, the heart wrenching sobs he had tried to hold back were set lose. Dick couldn’t control it any longer. He brought his knees to his chest, wrapping his arms around his legs and just cried. His while body shook and his breath came out short and jagged. He let the grief and pain consume him.

All because he had seen the two pink lines on every single one of the pregnancy tests.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I had this all typed up and I posted it a couple hours ago, but then I glanced through it and noticed some parts were missing. My stupid internet had been going out all day and I stupidly didn't save the chapter anywhere else but this site. I quickly retyped the missing parts so sorry if you got an email saying this story updated earlier today and then the chapter couldn't be found.  
> It's now fixed and finished. Hope you liked the real chapter 2.


	3. Chapter 3

The sun was shining, the sky was a beautiful, bright blue, birds were chirping; it just seemed like the perfect day. It wasn’t too hot and there was a slight breeze to help people stay cool. Just about everyone was out and about having an amazing day with friends and family.

Everyone except Dick.

He felt that the weather was the complete opposite of what it should be. Wasn’t it in movies that it would be dark and raining when people went to a cemetery? Apparently that’s not how things worked in real life. Instead it was one of the nicest days of the summer and Dick was making his way to the small graveyard next to the Manor.

The perfect weather just made Dick want to wallow in self pity. It seemed like everyone was having such a perfect day and here he was walking to his dead lover’s grave.

Dick felt like it was time that he told Jason that he was pregnant. It hadn’t seemed real at first; both Jason’s death and the life growing inside him seemed like a surreal dream. But after making an appointment with Leslie Thompkins and hearing his baby’s heartbeat for the first time, Grayson finally saw that being pregnant was a reality. Today, going to Jason’s grave would hopefully make his boyfriend’s death finally seem real, too. It had been a tough couple days, but Dick was slowly starting to cope with the recent events. It still didn’t make his pain go away, but it did help him start to think about the future.

Dick’s walk came to an end when he reached the small Wayne graveyard. He walked past Bruce’s parents gravestones until he reached his boyfriend’s ( _though are we really boyfriend’s now that Jason is gone?_ ). Dick took the last couple of steps until he was standing at the foot of Jason’s grave. The tip of his shoes were just barely touching the patch of dirt that still had yet to have grass grow over it. Dick then turned his attention from the grave to the gravestone.

 

JASON PETER TODD

  
Seeing the name carved into the stone made tears start to form in Dick’s eyes. He blinked the back and sat down on the dirt ground.

“Hey Jason,” Dick said, his voice coming out cracked. He swallowed and willed himself to keep going. “I’m sorry I didn’t visit sooner. I didn’t even get back to Earth until two days ago. I came straight to the Manor and ended up hearing the worst news of my life.”

The tears started coming back and again Dick blinked fast, trying not to let them spill out. He had a lot to say and he knew if he started crying now he wouldn’t be able to speak.

“I miss you.” It came out as a hoarse whisper, but it was the best the young Grayson could do. He was still struggling to keep the tears from spilling down his cheeks. “I hope you know that I’ll always love you. Always. You no-not being here anymore won’t change that,” he stuttered, taking a deep breath before continuing with, “I’m pregnant.”

Silence followed. It’s not like Dick had expected a reply, but he had hoped for some kind of sign. Instead he was left holding his breath so that no sob could escape his lips. After a few moments, he let out his breath and closed his eyes.

Behind his closed eyes was darkness while outside there was a shining sun and a blue sky. Inside there was a battle between grief, guilt, love, and sorrow. There was only one loser: Dick Grayson. This war of emotions left him feeling empty, lonely, and in pain. He hadn’t had a wink of sleep. He hadn’t showered, hadn’t eaten ( _what’s the point of eating if I’m just going to throw it all up?_ ), hadn’t even told anyone his big news besides Leslie and not Jason.

Richard John Grayson was a complete mess.

The usually smiling young adult was now only seen with a pained grimace. His usually bright, blue eyes were dull and hollow, surrounded by dark purple circles. Dick’s well kept hair was now greasy and hadn’t been brushed in days. He was even starting to get some stubble, seeing as how he couldn’t be bothered to shave.

“I bet you think I look like shit.” Dick let out a forced chuckle. “Don’t worry, Leslie’s already been on my case. She says I need to eat and sleep- and I know I do- but it’s been hard. I’m not hungry ever, and when I try to force food down I just end up throwing it back up. And believe me, I’m tired. I just want to go to sleep and dream about the great times we’ve had together. But I can’t even have that luxury. Every time I close my eyes I just see you being beaten by the Joker. I see you dying. I even see our child dying.”

There’s a slight pause before Dick says more quietly, “I can’t do it anymore.”

His voice cracked and the tears he tried to so hard to blink away are racing down his cheeks. He knows it would be a lost cause to try and stop the flow of tears now that they’ve been set free.  
“I can’t see you die. I can’t see our baby die. I can’t lay in a bed where we used to hold each other. I can’t talk to Bruce or Alfred and pretend everything is alright. I just- I just can’t.” Dick brings his knees to his chest and wraps his arms around himself and the first cry escapes his lips. And then another. And another. Until Dick is practically hyperventilating from letting out all the pain. He can hardly breathe with his lungs being on fire from his wails, but he _can’t stop_. Not now, maybe not ever.

It took about fifteen minutes, but Dick finally calmed down enough that he could get half-audible words out.

“Leslie already gave the whole spiel on suicide. And trust me, I could never do that with our unborn baby in my belly. And good news: Leslie said I’m no longer in danger of having a miscarriage. I’m thirteen weeks pregnant so the baby should be fine from here on out.”

Just thinking about the doctor’s appointment made Dick’s lips curve slightly upward. He got to see the baby- Oh! The picture. Dick quickly pulled out the sonogram Leslie had printed out.  
“This is out little baby, Jason. Perfectly healthy so far and will most likely be for the rest of the pregnancy. I still have a lot of time before they’re born, but I’ll tell our baby stories about you as soon as their ears develop. I think Leslie said that around week eighteen. And then as soon as they can see I’ll show them pictures. They’ll grow up knowing how much you would’ve loved them. I promise.”

Every second that Dick spent talking about the baby, he calmed down more and his smile would grow. He was already completely in love with unborn baby. And he knew Jason would’ve been in love, too. Now his only worry was how other members of the family would react to the big news.

“I still haven’t told anyone besides you and Leslie that I’m pregnant. I’ve been avoiding running into Bruce or Alfred because I’m sure they would be able to notice how my scent has changed. I guess I’m just not ready to tell them. Bruce didn’t even tell me you had- you were gone until weeks after it had happened. I did tell him we were a couple, but I left too quickly to really see his reaction. I’m just afraid of what he’ll say.”

Dick had to take a breather. The stress of what the rest of friends and family would say had been eating him alive. He just wanted to run away and not have to deal with telling him. That actually didn’t sound like such a bad idea.

“Do you think it would be bad if I just ran away?” Dick paused, but of course there would be no answer. The only sound that Dick could hear was the birds chirping as they flew overhead and the rustle of tree leaves from the breeze. Dick let out a long sigh. “Maybe I shouldn’t. I might be able to leave for a short time, but I’m sure Bruce would find me eventually.” Dick reached up and ran his hands through his hair, letting out another sigh.

“I love you, Little Wing. And I miss you so much right now that it feels like I’m dying. But I’m going to go and try to keep down some crackers and maybe get a couple hours of sleep. I promise I’ll be back soon.”

With that, Dick stood up, stopped to look at the gravestone for a few more seconds, and the turned around and started walking back on the trail. The whole walk was spent with Dick thinking about Jason and the baby. How had his life come to this? He thought his world had ended when he heard Jason had passed away, but now there was some hope. He had a baby growing inside of him, Jason’s baby, and maybe, just maybe, things were going to work out alright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about this taking so long and then being so short. I had finals, an ACT, and work. And when I did find the time to write I either had no motivation or had no clue what to write. Writer's block kills me.  
> So again, sorry, and I'll try to update soon.


	4. Chapter 4

Dick was dead to the world.

It was well past noon yet he was still wrapped up in a cocoon of blankets. His blinds were drawn and his phone was shut off.

This is how it has been for weeks.

Now Dick had never been one to have a tidy home, but these past two weeks had made everything a million times worse. The dishwasher hadn’t been loaded in that time leaving Dick with not a single clean dish. He hadn’t touched the washer and dryer. There were piles of clothes all around his apartment. Some piles were dirty but some weren’t. Dick had tried to wear his own clothes, but they were getting too tight. He soon switched to wearing what clothing he had of Jason’s. He had been wearing the same sweatpants and hoodie for over a week but he didn’t have the heart to wash them. Dick needed Jason’s scent to help calm him down.

Showering hadn’t really happened unless he had puked on himself since he didn’t always make it to the toilet in time. And even then, Dick’s definition of a “shower” was sitting down and letting the water hit him while he wallowed in self pity. He would dry off after sitting there for about half an hour only to put back on Jason’s clothes and climb back in his blanket cocoon.  
For food he had tried takeout a couple times, but nothing really stayed in his stomach. Everything just ended up being thrown up. This was a problem seeing as how he needed to take prenatal vitamins and he really needed them to stay in his system. He already missed the first thirteen weeks of taking them so he didn’t want to miss a single day after his appointment with Leslie. This had led to Dick buying an insane amount of crackers and tea, getting weird looks from other customers and the cashier, and then proceeding to not step foot in the store again.

Dick hadn’t even left the house after purchasing the crackers and tea. He had promised Jason he would visit soon, but he just couldn’t risk running into Bruce or Alfred. Now being into his second trimester, his scent had changed drastically and he knew anyone who took a breathe near him would be able to tell he was pregnant. The fear of how his family would react to him not only being pregnant but being pregnant with Jason’s child paralyzed him. He didn’t want to face anyone. Not now, not tomorrow, maybe not ever.

He knew he had told Jason that running would be stupid seeing as his father was The Batman, yet the idea seemed more appealing each passing day. If he ran he wouldn’t have to see the disappointment in Alfred’s or Bruce’s face. He wouldn’t have to deal with the looks of pity towards him.

Or maybe it’s anger he would be avoiding. Who knows how Bruce would react to Dick’s big news. Alfred would most likely be disappointed but he would still be kind and respectful. In Bruce’s eyes, Dick thought he would be seen as a failure, a fuck-up, a disgrace to both his Robin and Wayne title. He believed there was a good possibility that Bruce would get angry.

And that scared Dick.

Bruce wouldn’t hurt him, Dick was sure of that, but that didn’t stop him from being scared shitless at telling his father figure that he was currently pregnant with Jason’s kid.

It was almost a daily occurrence for Dick to have a panic attack. Sometimes it happened after he couldn’t catch his breath from puking so much. Sometimes it happened after thinking too much about what his future held. Either way it left him lightheaded, scared, and unable to breathe. He had had panic attacks before, but none were like the ones he had been getting recently. These ones occurred more often, lasted much longer, were stronger, and now he had no one to help him through it.

He was all alone.

That was what fueled most of his nightmares. Once his night terrors might have been filled with the villains he fought, but now they were filled with Jason dying at the hands of the Joker. He’d been having a lot of dream about his unborn child also dying. The old memories of his parents falling to their deaths made a reappearance. All his dreams were about how he had lost his family. How he was all by himself now.

Except he wasn’t.

Deep down Dick knew he had Bruce and Alfred along with Wally and maybe even Roy, but right now he still felt alone since he didn’t think any of them would really be supportive of his choice to keep the baby. And knowing that they would stand with him and yet be unsupportive of his life choices made him feel even more alone than having no family or friends.

This fear of everyone’s reactions, this feeling of being alone was what was driving Dick mad. He couldn’t handle the sleepless nights left staring at the ceiling because he was too afraid to close his eyes. He couldn’t stand the thought of telling everyone he was pregnant only to have them turn their backs on him.

And so he left his phone shut off. He new he probably had a million missed calls and unread texts, but at this point he didn’t care. Of course Bruce knew where his safe house was located, but Dick was banking on the fact that Bruce would give his first son some space before coming after him.

Dick tried to convince himself that he needed time to process, but he knew that soon he was going to have to face the real world. In a couple days he would be out of food. And even if he just ordered more to his apartment, he had an appointment with Leslie in two weeks. He was going to have to leave the safety of his apartment soon enough.

He didn’t want to wait until someone came to look for him. Dick wanted to tell them on his own terms. So reluctantly, Dick unwrapped himself from his cocoon of blankets and turned his phone back on.

* * *

Scent blocker? Check. Car keys? Check. Ultrasound picture? Check.

Dick took a deep breathe to try to calm his nerves before opening his apartment door for the first time in two weeks. He had showered (with actual soap), shaved, and put on a clean pair of clothes (he still hasn’t washed Jason’s sweats so he settled for some of his baggier clothing). Yet even with all that effort he still looked like shit. His skin was paler than normal. He was skinny compared to his normal weight but was way under what he should be at fifteen weeks pregnant. Under his eyes were large, dark bags. One glance and anyone could figure out that he hadn’t slept in a very long time.

But this was as good as it was going to get. At least he was able to find scent blocker with his Nightwing gear. It was usually meant to hide his omega scent from the criminals he faced, but today he was using it in hopes of giving himself a few extra minutes before Bruce and Alfred found out he was expecting.

Dick locked his apartment door behind him and made his way to his car. It took him a few minutes before he found the courage to actually start the car and more still until he actually started driving.

The whole ride was spent with Dick blaring music from whatever station would come in clear. He would take anything in hopes of it keeping him from overthinking things. Overthinking leads to stress and stress leads to harming his baby. Dick couldn’t handle anyone else close to him getting hurt.

After what seemed like an eternity, the first boy wonder was parked in front of the Manor. Dick got out of the car and shakily made his way to the front door. Without a second thought he knocked on the door. Before he had a chance to chicken out and turn back, the door creaked open revealing Alfred.

“Master Dick,” Alfred said, his face showing how surprised he was to finally see the young boy again. After no word from Dick in two weeks, he was the last person Alfred had expected to be standing outside the Manor.

“Hey Alfred.” Dick attempted to give a smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes.

“Please, come in.” Alfred ushered him inside. As soon as the door was shut behind them, the butler pulled Dick into a bruising hug. The young man breathed in Alfred’s comforting beta scent, relaxing slightly once he did. At the same time Alfred too a whiff of the omega’s scent. Something seemed…off. Alfred could tell that Dick had used a scent blocker. But why? And what was that underlying scent? Before Alfred could figure it out, Dick pushed himself out of the hug.

“I need to talk to you and Bruce.” He said it without looking Alfred in the eyes. He was standing slouching with his arms wrapped around his midsection.

“Of course. May I offer you a drink or-“

“No.” Dick winced when he heard how harsh his answer had come out. “I mean, no thanks. I just need to talk to you and Bruce.”

“Right this way, young sir.”

With each step that Dick took, the worse the feeling in the pit of his stomach became. It was almost as if he was nauseous, but he refused to throw up before he had a chance to talk.  
Soon they were in front of Bruce’s office door. Dick almost turned around. He almost ran the other way, wanting to be back in the safety of his own apartment, but his feet stayed glued to the floor. Alfred knocked three times before opening the door, not even waiting for Bruce to reply.

Bruce looked better than the last time Dick saw him. His hair was combed back, his clothes were wrinkle free, and his eyes no longer looked so tired. _Did it really only take another two weeks for Bruce to be done grieving?_ , Dick asked himself. He could only imagine what he looked like to Bruce right now. It was almost like the two of them had switched. Now it was Dick who was the one looking like shit.

“Dick?” Bruce quickly got up from his chair and walked over to engulf his first son in a bear hug. Dick was faster to push away from Bruce than he was with Alfred. He knew Alfred had sensed something was wrong with his scent and he didn’t want Bruce to figure it out yet.

“We need to talk.” The sentence hing in the air for a few moments before Bruce stepped back and gestured for Dick to take a seat. Bruce went back to his own seat at his desk while Alfred just came to stand beside him.

After Dick sat down there was a tense silence between them. Dick could feel his hands shaking. His heart was starting to race. _You can do this, you can do this_ , he kept repeating to himself. It didn’t really help. He assumed that both Bruce and Alfred could probably smell how nervous he was. His assumption was proved to be correct when he could smell Bruce releasing calming pheromones. Alphas were able to manipulate their scent in order to help omegas relax. Usually it annoyed Dick when someone tried it on him, but in this moment he was grateful.  
With a shaky breath, Dick decided it was probably best to just come right out and say it. He raised his eyes to meet Bruce’s and let out his big news.

“I’m pregnant.” As soon as the word came out, he felt the onset of a panic attack. Even with Bruce’s relaxing pheromones, Dick was having a hard time to catch his breath. But before he lost his breath completely he added “It’s Jason’s.”

He closed his eyes not only because he didn’t want to see Alfred and Bruce’s reaction but also because he needed to focus on his breathing. The pain in his chest made it almost impossible for him take in any air. His hands gripped armrests as he tried to let the panic attack pass.

Soon he felt a hand on his back rubbing soothing circles.He opened his eyes and looked to his left to see Alfred crouching over him.

“Young sir, deep breaths.” And Dick tried, but it was hard. Still, he wasn’t going to let this panic attack stop him from talking. Bruce hadn’t said anything so Dick was going to finish saying what he need Bruce to hear.

“I’m keeping it.” He flashed his eyes over to where Bruce was sitting. “I-I don’t care what you think. I know I’m young and I know Jason is de-gone, but I’m keeping this baby. Nothing you say is going to make me-“

And he was back to square one. He couldn’t get anymore words out due to lack of air. His panic attack was back full force. Dick closed his eyes again and tried to focus on Bruce’s calming pheromones and Alfred’s hand that was still rubbing circles on his back. But none of it was helping.

Everything was suddenly so real. He was pregnant. With Jason’s baby. And Jason was gone-no, dead. Jason was dead. _Dead_. He wasn’t coming back. Dick was now going to be a single parent. And now-

For the third time that day, Dick had arms wrap around him, stopping his train of thought from getting any farther. He opened his eyes to see that Bruce once again hugging him.

“Oh, Dick.” Bruce’s voice cracked. And then Dick was crying. He pressed his face against Bruce’s and just sobbed. He felt Bruce’s body shake and new he too was crying. But they were crying for many reasons. They were crying because Jason was dead. They were crying because Dick was pregnant. They were crying because they both were saying sorry and forgiving each other.

After who knows how long, they let go of each other. Dick sat back in his chair and wiped his tear stained face. Glancing around, he found that Alfred was nowhere to be found. He must have slipped out earlier. The ex-boy wonder glanced back at his father.

“Dick…” Bruce tried to get out more, but he found he didn’t have the words to express what he wanted to say. That was okay with Dick. He didn’t know if he could get out any words.  
So they just sat next to each other, having a conversation without words, until Alfred walked in with a tray of tea and sandwiches. Then the three of them grabbed the food and drink, this time a comfortable silence falling over them.

Dick thought this went better than expected. And while he didn’t exactly know where Bruce or Alfred stood with his decision about the baby, he believed things would be okay between the three of them. Now he just had to respond to the messages from his friends and tell them the big news.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so obviously this chapter didn't come as soon as I said. Sorry. I just get really bad writer's block, but believe me, I'm trying to get these chapters out as soon as I possibly can.
> 
> Also, thanks so much for all the kudos and comments!


	5. Chapter 5

The next few weeks were a blur. Soon Dick was 20 weeks pregnant- halfway done. He had moved back into the Manor shortly after talking to Bruce and Alfred. They both said they would support whatever he decided to do, yet Dick couldn’t help but assume they were talking behind his back.

It’s not like he could blame them. He was always the responsible one. Sure, he had some teenage rebellions (besides fucking his younger brother he did drink and cut class a couple times), but he always got straight A’s. He excelled in school, extracurriculars, and being Robin. He had never really let his father figure down…well, until now. 

Dick tried to pretend it wasn’t disappointment but pity he saw in Bruce’s eyes. Not that pity was really any better, but he felt like anyone would receive a pitied look if they were pregnant with their deceased mate’s child. It’s not like Bruce ever said anything about how ashamed he was of Dick for getting pregnant at 18 (or if he even was ashamed of his adopted son at all). Actually, they never really talked about the pregnancy or the baby. It was like those were taboo topics. And Dick was okay with the whole not talking thing. He never really wanted to talk about it either. He just wanted to know where exactly his guardian stood. Was he really disappointed in Dick? Was he more guilty thinking that his bad parenting was the cause of this? Was Bruce just sad about how all this had to happen to his young son? Dick didn’t know and probably wouldn’t know with how often Bruce and he had a heartfelt conversation.

It was the not knowing that was making being at the Manor hard for pregnant boy. Every once in a while Dick would slip back to his own apartment. But not long after he would be back in his room at the Manor. He liked being around his family, he just knew that they weren’t that happy about the situation he was in.

It’s not like he was much happier about predicament. Dick no longer spent his mornings puking, but other symptoms were getting worse. His back _hurt_. And his ankles and feet were so swollen he had to buy new shoes. One slightly embarrassing side effect of being pregnant was the fact that Dick was starting to get breasts. Of course, they weren’t big, just slightly swollen. He knew that they got bigger in order to help produce milk for his baby, but that didn’t stop a light blush to paint his cheeks when he had to start wearing a bra. Every so often some milk would leak out and to Dick that was absolutely mortifying. He had asked Leslie about it and she had said that while it was early for his body to do that, it was nothing to worry about.

Dick had gone to see Leslie a couple times since moving into the Manor. Each time he went he was shaking from nerves about if his baby was doing okay. And each time Leslie would assure him that the baby was perfectly fine. 

The moment that really helped convince Dick that his baby was fine was when he felt them kick him for the first time. He had been eating dinner with Alfred and Bruce when suddenly he dropped the fork from his hand and moved to press his palms against his slightly rounded belly. Instantly, Alfred and Bruce were at his side asking if he was okay. And he wanted to tell them that he was, that this was actually something great, but he was too focused on a second and then a third kick that he felt. 

He was afraid that something had been wrong. No matter how many times Leslie told him that he was fine, he couldn’t help but worry that something wasn’t right. His baby should have been kicking by now. Well, not kicking, but Dick should have been able to feel the “quickening” as it was called by 16 weeks. Yet at 18 weeks he still hadn’t felt a single movement from his baby. 

To finally be able to feel that his baby was moving and fine made his start to tear up. Dick had been so worried he was doing everything wrong. He tried to eat healthy and get some light exercise, but there was always the dark thoughts that swam around in his head telling him that he was going to screw everything up. But now feeling his baby moving inside of his, those evil thoughts got pushed to the back of his mind. His baby was alive and fine.

Another thing that helped the boy be reassured that his baby was okay was what he go to hear during each appointment. Dick would get to listen to the heartbeat and every single time he heard the whooshing sound of his baby’s heartbeat it seemed like the whole world has stopped. It always brought tears to his eyes knowing that his baby was alive and growing inside him. 

Usually Dick is too engrossed in the sound to even hear anything Leslie is saying, but during the last appointment she asked him something that shifted his attention from the baby to his doctor.

“Would you like to know the gender?” That one question made the boy freeze. Did he? He bit his bottom lip and went back to listening to the comforting sound of his child’s heartbeat while he pondered the question. After a few moments he turned to face Leslie with his answer.

“No.” It came out quiet but certain.

“You sure?” Leslie asked to be positive that boy wouldn’t change his mind. The baby was in the perfect position for her to tell him the gender.

“I’m sure,” Dick replied with a slight smile. He was 100% positive he didn’t want to know. Jason passing away was a surprise. Dick being pregnant was a surprise. He felt like this should be a surprise too. 

He left that appointment feeling slightly happier than he had in weeks with a couple print outs of his little baby.

* * *

Dick had texted back all of his friends. Barbara, Kori, Wally, and even Roy had all been worried about their best friend when he raced off to the Manor and then was never heard from or seen again. Of course, they had all heard about the untimely demise of the the second Robin. 

While Dick had never come out and said it, his friends were able to figure out the relationship between Jason and their friend. They noticed how often the two would hang out, sometimes holding hands. A couple times they even caught a quick kiss between the two. It wasn’t hard to see how much Nightwing and Robin liked each other. 

Now they were all worried about how Dick was holding up. Receiving a text from him reassuring them that he was fine made all four of them sigh on relief and then start to stress out again about why Dick had taken to respond to them. Was he really okay?

No one could be 100% sure if he was really fine because no one had been able to see him in person. Now they had been getting regular texts, but it was all just small talk. 

No one brought up Jason.

They just kept checking in to see if Dick was fine and if he wanted to hang out. Every time they asked to hang out, he would decline and make up some excuse as to why he couldn’t. None of them bought it, but none of them pushed.

Then finally, _finally_ , Dick asked if they all wanted to meet up at a small Diner in Gotham. Within seconds all four of them had respond with a yes.

So that’s how the four of Dick’s friends ended up at a small corner table in a Diner waiting patiently (or rather, impatiently) for Dick to finally show up. 

When Dick finally made it to the Diner he saw his friends first and made his way over to their table. He watched how one by one his friends turned to look at him, notice his protruding belly, and then have their jaws drop. As he sat down, all four of his friends still just stared at him with wide eyes and mouths gaping. 

And for the first time in a long time he gave a genuine smile that actually reached his eyes.

“Hey guys,” he started but no one said anything as they were trying to process what they were seeing. Millions of thoughts raced through their heads. Who was the father? Was it…was it Jason?

Kori, who was sitting to Dick’s left, just pulled him into a big hug. He had missed this, being able to hang out with his friends. There was a little regret about not meeting with them sooner, but Dick tried to reason saying that he had needed time to cope and work through everything. And now he finally felt okay with being able to meet up with his friends and tell them the truth. 

He had been scared about what they would say. Their opinion was just as important as Alfred and Bruce’s were. Dick hoped that the hug from Kori meant that she was accepting what was going on. She let go of him and sat back with a small, sad smile of her lips. Dick glanced to look at his other friends.

Babs was the first one to speak. “Is it…” but she didn’t finish, not sure if she should speak the dead Robin’s name. 

“Ya. It’s Jason’s,” Dick stated, confirming everyone’s thoughts. 

At that moment the waitress came over to ask if they were ready to order, but Roy just asked if they could have a few more minutes and she went on her way.

A slightly awkward silence followed. Everyone was still trying to get it in their heads that their best friend was pregnant. And with Jason’s baby. Dick shifted uncomfortably in his seat and unconsciously started to rub his belly.

Dick attempted to start up a conversation. “Jason and I…we ar-were mates.” Looking at his friends’ faces, Dick realized the none of them looked surprised in the slightest.

“Dude, we know.” This time it was Roy who spoke. 

“And we were so sorry to hear about what happened to your mate,” Kori said.

“So if you need anything, and I mean anything, you just let us know,” Wally chimed in. Hearing this caused Dick to start getting misty-eyed (stupid pregnancy hormones, obviously).

“Thanks, you guys. I really appreciate it,” he said as he went to wipe the tears away from his eyes. The four of friends had a conversation in just looks and Dick suddenly felt a tight knot in his stomach. 

They would support him, but would they also support his choice for keeping his baby?

Babs reached out to grab Dick’s hands in hers. “We just want you to be happy. And we’ll always help you do anything you need in order to be happy.” Everyone nodded their head in agreement. “And I also think everyone can agree that I will be the godmother.”

Dick let out a little laugh. A _laugh_. Then Kori and Barbara started arguing over who got godmother rights. And Wally and Roy then started to tell Dick about why they were better than the other one which means they should be godfather. 

Dick had a huge smile on his face even though he had to keep wiping his eyes to keep tears from spilling over. But for once these were tears of happiness. His friends supported him and were accepting the baby. Why did he ever for one second think that they wouldn’t? These were his best friends. They always had each others back no matter what. 

So with the support of his friends and family, Dick believed that he could do this. He could have his and Jason’s baby. He could raise his child to be strong. He could raise them knowing their father would have loved them. He could do it, all of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I just decided that I wanted Barbara, Kori, Wally, and Roy to be Dick's best friends. Just go with it. And also sorry for them being so OOC.


	6. Chapter 6

The next few months were a blur of weird food cravings, doctor appointments, arguments, and healing. Things weren’t necessarily good, but they were getting better. Dick was going out more; eating out with friends, shopping for baby supplies, just being social. 

Everyone was happy about this. Like extremely happy. They’re best friend got knocked up at 18 only to have his mate die weeks later. But now he was laughing, smiling, loving this small child growing inside of him.

Now of course it wasn’t all love and smiles. Dick still had days where he physically couldn’t leave his bed. The weight of raising this child alone- without Jason by his side- still sometimes kept him from being able to get up and function. Some days it just felt like he was spiraling down, his life out of control. 

This concerned his friends. They urged him to talk to a doctor, but he assured them he was fine, just trying to cope. Dick did talk to Leslie. He actually talked to her all the time. He had shared his concerns about his depressed episodes. Leslie wasn’t too concerned (his mate had died and left him alone pregnant with their  child) but had suggested that Dick talk to an actual therapist. Of course, Dick refused, so Leslie made sure to keep a watchful eye on him. 

The main thing she was concerned about was Dick’s stress affecting the baby. She voiced this concern which honestly made Dick even more stressed. “How the hell can I stop stressing Leslie!? Nothing about this isn’t stressful!” “Well for starters you should stop stressing about your stress.”

She tipped his friends that Dick really needed to destress which led to many spa days. Oh and lots of comfort food paired with movie nights.

Another concern (which she kept to herself) was that Dick would get postpartum depression. He loved his baby so much already that she didn’t think it was necessary to voice this concern, but it still was in the back of her mind. So much had already happened and she didn’t want to stress Dick out anymore. He had enough going on like his relationship Bruce. Which hadn’t been going too well for a while…

* * *

Bruce was well Bruce. He never really showed much emotion, always kept his feeling under control. He could be very hard to talk to. And with Dick being just as stubborn as his father figure it was hard for an argument to not occur.

“Dick, you are moving into the manor and that is final.” Of course Bruce was only try to be helpful. Not the best way to show Dick he loved him, but let’s be honest, Bruce is not the best at expressing emotion. 

“I’m fine in my own apartment.” Dick probably knew that Bruce was trying to be nice, but it was deep down. He just wanted to be able to have the freedom to be alone when he needed to be alone. His apartment was a place to escape the world when everything seemed to be crashing down.

“You should not be living alone.” Again, not being mean, just caring enough for his adopted son that he wanted Dick living in the Manor where he would be safe and loved. 

“I won’t be alone,” Dick said, exasperated. 

Bruce just sighed. “The baby does not count.”

“Who says?”

“Dick can you just-“

“I don’t need to hear what you have to say. My apartment has two bedrooms; one of which is being converted in a nursery right now. It’s in a safe neighborhood. It’s fine.”

“Would you think logically for a second? The manor has more space for you to set up a nursery. And why stay in the apartment by yourself when you have your family here?"

“Not all of my family. Not anymore,” Dick snapped, giving Bruce his best bat glare.

Bruce’s stern face softened. “Dick, you know-“

But Dick was already getting up (if not slowly because of his large stomach) and making his way out of the room. Bruce just rubbed his hands down his face, shoulders sagging. It just seemed like the two of them could never get on the same page anymore. Everything was a battle now. The hospital bills, which hospital Dick would be giving birth in, what food Dick ate, and now where he should live.

Bruce just wanted the best for his adoptive son and was oblivious to the fact that he came off very controlling. 

Well, no matter where Dick decided to live, nothing would change Bruce’s mind on setting up a nursery in the Manor.

* * *

While it might seem like Dick and Bruce were butting heads at every second of everyday, they actually did understand each other fairly well. To them it might seem like all they did was argue, but everyone else knew it was just because both of them were scared and neither one wanted to admit it.

There were actually many days where everything was perfectly fine between the father and son.

Like when Bruce showed Dick the nursery he had set up in the Manor. It was right next to Dick’s childhood bedroom (which was still his current bedroom if you asked Bruce or Alfred). The nursery has a yellow and green color scheme with the wall decorations family photos. Dick sobbed when he saw the photos of him and Jason (“It was just pregnancy hormones!”). Dick had turned around after two seconds of looking at the nursery and for a split second Bruce was afraid Dick hated it. He was proven wrong when Dick had embraced him for a hug, soaking Bruce's shirt with his tears.

Or how about when Bruce didn’t go on patrol because Dick had come over for dinner, but then didn’t feel good at all. He was nauseous and Bruce immediately wanted to take him to see Leslie. Dick of course had to assure him he was fine. Just morning sickness carrying on into the night. Still, Bruce stayed in that night and watched bad movies with Dick. 

And then that little baby kicked. 

Dick quickly grabbed Bruce’s hand so he could feel his grandchild kick. Bruce absolutely loved the baby. He might try to play it off, but no matter what he was doing, he would drop it if it meant he could feel his grandchild kick.

So even though much of the time seemed like they were just fighting, they did have great times too.

Of course one of their good times had to be interrupted. 

They were having a nice dinner, Dick, Bruce, and Alfred. No fights. No harsh words. No tension. It was nice, simple, and full of love. Just as Alfred was about to bring out dessert Dick felt a sharp pain. His grunt in pain caused Bruce and Alfred to instantly ask if he was okay. He brushed them off saying it was just Braxton Hicks.

Truth was he had been camping all day. But he wasn’t ready. The _baby_  wasn’t ready.

Dinner continued on. Then they watched a movie. And another one. The whole time Dick was getting more cramps. He did his best to hide the pain. Bruce and Alfred didn’t make anymore comments so Dick assumed that they either really didn’t notice or that they weren’t going to call Dick out for being in pain.

By the time the last movie ended Bruce declared that is was too late for Dick to be driving back to his apartment. Dick ended up heading to his old bedroom either because he actually agreed with Bruce or just didn’t feel like arguing. Either way everyone went to bed, even Bruce who skipped patrol since Dick had actually agreed to spending the night.

So it was at 2 a.m. that Dick got up to go to the bathroom (the baby was always on his bladder) when he felt some type of liquid running down his legs. He didn’t wet his pants, did he? He would never live that down if anyone found out.

Dick hurried to the bathroom and flipped on the light to realize that he had not peed his pants. No, his water had broke. 

Shit.

Dick gripped the sink counter, knuckles going white.

No, no, no, no!

He was only 35 weeks. The baby was not ready. He was not ready. He was not-

Dick shook his head and tried to get control over his breathing. Now would not be a good time to have a panic attack. Now would not be a good time to go into one of hid depressed moods. Now _would_  be a good time to get Bruce.

Dick waddled as fast as he could back to his room. He quickly changed clothes and went down the hall to wake up Bruce. He had to take a couple break holding onto the wall as a contraction passes. Eventually he made it to Bruce’s room where he burst through the door, not bothering to knock.

“Bruce, we need to go to the hospital now,” he practically shouted. Bruce was up in seconds. And soon so was Alfred. Before anyone really had time to process what was going on, the three of them were in the car racing to the hospital. 

The baby was coming whether they were ready or not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hate myself. I haven't updated in months. But senior year is stressful, work is stressful, applying to college it stressful, life is stressful. It has been way too long since I have updated and I am so sorry!


	7. Chapter 7

A few hours into labor found Dick exhausted, sweaty, and very much in pain. He had planned on getting an epidural, but he had to wait until he was 5cm dilated. And even though it’s been hours, Dick is still only at 4cm. Now, he had done his research. He had come up with a fairly detailed plan for this birth. He knew what to expect and how to deal with what would occur. Or at least he thought he did.

Turns out no matter how much research you do, you never really can comprehend how bad labor actually is. Dick thought he would be able to get an epidural once he got settled into his hospital room. He thought for sure he would already be well past 5cm by the time he got into his hospital room for how close his contractions were to one another. Dick realizes now just how wrong he was.

Another contraction hit and Dick gripped the arm rails of his bed. His face was scrunched in pain and his jaw was clenched so tight he was sure he would break a couple teeth. Halfway through the contraction the door opened and in walked the nurse Julie?, Judie?, Jane? (stupid pregnancy brain). She walked over to his bad and attempted to comfort him by rubbing his arm.

“Don’t forget to breath,” she said gently.

“Easier said that done,” Dick managed to spit out through the pain. The nurse gave a small smile and stood up once it seemed like the contraction was over. Dick released his death grip on the bed rails and laid back against the pillows. 

“Well, you know why I’m here,” the nurse said while putting on gloves. Dick didn’t even complain as she walked back over to his bed. He just spread his legs and let her check how dilated he was. At first it was extremely awkward to uncomfortable to have a stranger stick their hands down there, but after the first few times the only problem Dick has with it it the nurse’s cold hands. 

“Please tell me I’m at 5cm,” Dick begs.

“You’re almost at 6cm now. It looks like it might be speeding up for you now.” She stepped back and took off her gloves.

“Oh thank god!”

“I’ll go get the anesthesiologist and we’ll get you that epidural in no time.” And with that she was gone, leaving Dick in the room all by himself. 

This is what you wanted, Dick reminded himself. Preferably Jason would be there with him, but that just wasn’t possible. Dick sighed and curled up on his side almost crying out in pain as another contraction hit him.

He didn’t have to be alone. Alfred and Bruce were out in the waiting room. Alfred didn’t think it was appropriate to be in the room and Dick just didn’t want Bruce there. It wasn’t because they are fighting again. No, it was mostly because Dick just didn’t want Bruce to see him this weak. It was Dick’s fault he had gotten knocked up at eighteen and he just had to grow up and live with the consequences. 

Was that sound logic? No of course not, but Dick had said he wanted to do it alone and Bruce respected that. That doesn’t mean that Bruce isn’t having his own breakdown in the waiting room because his son is _in labor_. Nope, Bruce definitely wasn’t freaking the fuck out over the fact the Dick was alone and in pain. But Bruce would respect Dick’s wished and wait (not patiently) for the doctor to come and update him.

While Alfred was trying to get Bruce to eat some cafeteria food, Dick was curled up on his side, gripping the side rail, and letting the anesthesiologist stick a big ass needle into his spine. But after fifteen minutes, Dick’s lower half was numb. He honestly almost started to tear up at the amazing feeling of no pain.

After getting the epidural, the nurse once again checked his dilation and found him to be nearing 7cm. 

“If you’re feeling tired, now would be your best bet at getting some sleep. If you keep dilating at this rate you’ll be ready to push in 3 hours.” The nurse gave him a smile and left, dimming the lights in the room on her way out. Wishing minutes Dick was passed out on the bed.

The only downside to trying to take a nap was that he kept getting woken up so that the nurse could check on the baby and his dilation. And just as she had predicted, Dick was almost at 10cm about three hours later. The lowered the amount of medication for his epidural so that he could be able to feel when he would need to push.

The nurse contacted the doctor that Dick would be ready to push very soon. While waiting for the doctor, the nurse stayed with Dick and did her best to try and keep him calm.

All of the sudden everything seemed way to real for Dick. Yes he knew he was in labor to have his baby. Yes he had been in pain for hours. Yes he knew that shortly he would welcome his baby into the world. But the nurse calling the doctor and then the contractions coming back slightly (but very close together) just made everything actually click. Very soon (too soon if you asked Dick) he would be holding his baby in his arms. 

And suddenly he didn’t know if he could do it.

The nurse must’ve noticed his slowly increasing heart rate because she grabbed his hands in hers gave them a big squeeze.

“You can do this. In just a few minutes the doctor will be here and soon after that your baby will be here in your arms.” Her encouragement helped a little, but Dick was still very much freaking out.

He wasn’t ready. He didn’t know how to be a dad. He didn’t know how to take care of an infant. What if he screwed up? Or accidentally did something to hurt his baby? And Jason wasn’t even here to help, but there was someone who could com help...

“Dick you need to snap out of it. Deep, slow breaths. You need to calm down. We don’t want to stress the baby out. You can do this. Breathe with me.” The nurse gave some slow breaths in hopes that Dick would copy but instead he blurted out something he should’ve said a long time ago.

“I need Bruce.” The nurse dropped his hands and started to get up.

“Okay. Just give me one moment.” At that moment the door opened and in walked the doctor looking ready to deliver a baby. That of course just freaked Dick out more. His breaths turned to pants and his eyes started to water.

“No, I need Bruce NOW.” The doctor and the nurse must’ve had a telepathic conversation because the doctor was out of the room in two seconds. She sat back down next to Dick. 

“The doctor will bring Bruce. But we really need to work on your breathing. Follow me, ready?” And this time Dick did copy her breathing pattern and soon his heart rate was able to go back to a safe range. However, he wasn’t able to stop the tears from streaking down his cheeks.

When Bruce and the doctor walked in only five minutes later, Dick was breathing normally but had tears still streaming down his face. The nurse quickly got up and let Bruce sit down in he place.

No words are needed between the father and son. Bruce reached over and pulled Dick into a hug when he had seen Dick’s mouth start to tremble. Dick grabbed Bruce’s shirt in his fists and help on like his life depended on it. They help onto each other until a contraction ripped through Dick’s body, causing him to tighten his hold on Bruce’s shirt.

The doctor cleared his throat and the two broke apart when Dick’s contraction was over. The stirrups had been flipped up so Dick got situated in a position that was as comfortable as it was going to get. As he went to grab the bed rails, Bruce grabbed his right hand. Dick looked over at Bruce in surprise and Bruce squeezed his hand in response.

“Okay Dick. On the next contraction I want you to push,” the doctor said. Dick nodded and as soon as he felt the next contraction coming he pushed. If Bruce felt any pain from Dick squeezing his hand, he didn’t show it. Bruce was perfectly fine with practically getting his hand broken by Dick after hearing the shouts of pain Dick was giving. On every contraction Dick pushed and screamed. While the epidural was still somewhat helping, it felt like he was burning "down there."

Time was no longer a thing. Dick had no idea how long it had been since he started pushing, but it seemed longer than the whole rest of his labor had been (he later found out it had only been a little over an hour). The nurse was giving him encouragement throughout the whole thing and would occasionally wipe his forehead with a cool clothe. 

“I see the head,” the doctor announced. “Just a few more pushes now.”

Dick could only moan in response. But sure enough, a few contractions later and Dick felt the pressure leave him. A shrill cry filled the air.

“It’s a boy!” The doctor quickly wrapped a towel around the baby boy and laid him down on Dick’s chest. 

The baby’s loud cries were deafening, but Dick couldn't care less. All he cared about was that his baby was here. His beautiful baby boy. He couldn’t stop the tears that came at the overwhelming joy of holding his baby in his hands.

Bruce gave Dick’s hand one last squeeze before letting it drop so that Dick could better hold his son. Bruce leaned over to get a better look at his grandson. And just as Dick had instantly fallen in love with the infant, so did Bruce. He put a hand on Dick’s shoulder and whispered “I am so proud of you.”

Dick smiled slightly though he never took his eyes of the baby boy. A few seconds passed before Bruce then added “Jason would be too.” That brought even more tears, now tears of sadness and happiness. Dick knew that Jason would be so in love with this small baby. Their baby. It was hard to think about what Jason was missing, but for once Dick could push it to the back of his mind. All he could think about was how _small_ his son was.

“-the cord?” Dick caught the end of what the doctor was saying and forced himself to look away from the baby and figure out what they were saying. The doctor was talking to Bruce and holding out a pair of what looked like scissors. 

“No, I couldn’t,” Bruce replied. Everything clicked in Dick’s head.

“Go ahead,” Dick said making Bruce look at him with wide eyes. Bruce slowly made his way over to where the doctor was standing and then then the nurse directed him on cutting the cord. 

Bruce then made his way back to his spot in Dick’s right. Dick had gone back to staring at his perfect little baby. The nurse came up on Dick’s left and started to reach for the baby. 

“Sorry, but I need to get the little one all cleaned up.” Dick reluctantly handed his baby over to the nurse who left to get him cleaned and tested. 

“Do you have a name picked out?” the doctor asked Dick.

A small smile formed on Dick's lips as he replied with “Thomas Peter Grayson."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was really hard to write since I've never had a kid so sorry if it seems off.  
> There is only going to be one more chapter for this fanfic. I made a series (please subscribe) where I'll post the rest of the fics for this series. I won't start the next one until this one is over, but it'll all be in chronological order.  
> Huge thank you for all the comments and kudos!! I appreciate all of you guys understanding why it takes me forever to update. Since I'm on break I'll try to update again soon.  
> Happy Holidays!


	8. Chapter 8

Dick made his way down the winding path leading to the Wayne graveyard. It was a slow walk but that could be blamed on how sore Dick’s body was. Only three days has passed since Thomas was born and his body was slowly healing.

 

The first day and a half, Dick was stuck in the hospital. He couldn’t wait to get out of there. The doctor and the nurse were nice, but he just wanted time with his baby all by himself. He didn’t want the nurses coming in what seemed like very five minutes to do quick check-ups. He didn’t want Bruce always hovering near the hospital bed. He didn’t want any visitors, either.

Bruce and Alfred had both tried to convince him to let his friends in to visit. But Dick didn’t want to see anyone. Actually, he didn’t want anyone else to see Thomas. It didn’t feel right to show off his newborn baby when the other father hadn’t even gotten to meet him.

After a day and a half in the hospital, the doctor released Dick and Thomas. With the help of Bruce and Alfred, they had gotten settled into their room/ nursery. It was a slow process, but eventually everything was set up exactly how Dick wanted it (with some pauses as he would glare at Bruce or Alfred for commenting on how funny it was to see him “nesting”). 

Another day passed and this time Dick finally got real alone time with his son. All Dick could do was stare in wonder at this beautiful baby boy he had made and how much Jason would have loved him. Thomas already had a mop of jet black hair. His eyes were blue but they were the exact same shade as Jason’s and Dick prayed that they would stay that way. Every other feature was a copy of Jason’s. It almost made it more painful that way, for Dick to constantly see his dead lover every time he looked at his son. But he was also glad to see Thomas take after his other father so much.

And while Dick loved to just watch everything his son did, he also wanted sleep. Doing this all my himself (“Bruce, Alfred. I’m fine. I can handle this on my own.”) was a lot of work. Thomas needed attention 24/7 which Dick had known from all the research he had done, but still, it didn’t seem hard until he actually had to do it. Thomas needed to be fed like a hundred times a day and then he would need to be burped, and then he would need his diaper changed, and then he sleep for just a wink and the cycle would repeat all over again.

Dick’s body was still so sore after those three days but he felt like he could push through it and make it down to Jason’s grave. Which leaves us back with Dick walking ever so slow towards his lover’s tomb. 

It was cold to begin with, but then a harsh breeze went through. Little Thomas let out a whimper causing Dick to pull him closer. Even with the amount of layers he had put Thomas in, the breeze still affected him.

“Sorry sweetie, but this won’t be long and we can go back inside.” Dick wrapped his jacket around Thomas too and then kissed the top of his head. “Just a little bit longer.”

And it wasn’t much longer before they reached Jason’s grave. With one big breath, Dick worked up the courage to walk up and then sit in front of the headstone. Tears were already welling in his eyes, he was sore, and Thomas was cold but he knew he needed to do this. Jason should be able to meet his son. One more deep breath and Dick worked up the courage to talk. 

“Hey Jason.” He stopped to sniffle. “I want you to meet your son, Thomas Peter Grayson.” 

Dick unwrapped Thomas from his jacket as if doing so would allow Jason to see what Thomas looked like.

“He looks just like you. Same bright blue eyes. Same everything actually. He even has a huge appetite like you did.”

Another whimper from Thomas had Dick wrapping the baby back into Dick’c jacket. Holding Thomas tight against his chest, Dick felt the tears escape and start racing down his cheeks.

“I wish you could see him,” Dick whispered, his eyes squeezed shut. “I wish you were here.”

He could barely contain the sob that wanted to be heard. Dick tried to reign in his feelings, but it was too late. Thomas started to cry, smelling the distress coming off of his father. Dick reopened his eyes and gave a sad smile to the gravestone.

“Shhhh, Thomas. It’s okay. It’s gonna be okay."

After he got his son to quiet down he got up, his body aching, and gave one last glance at the headstone. He would be back soon, he knew, but it was still sad to have to leave. To have to face reality once again. But his son was cold and probably hungry at this point so Dick needed to get back. He started the slow walk back to the Manor, glad that Jason had finally met their son.

Dick started to mentally prepare himself for all of the people who wanted to meet Thomas. It was going to be a long couple of days to be social and share his baby with everyone. But he would get through it. Thomas needed to meet everyone. Dick needed to get his life back on track. 

Looking back down at his son, Dick smiled. He could do this. Everything was going to be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter is so short! I wanted something longer after I took such a long to update but I feel like I got everything into this chapter that I wanted. And I really was going to update this before my winter break was over, but I lost motivation and writer's block sucks (I am also a bad writer and finding the right words or just trying to describe what I picture in my head is so freaking hard- I have so much respect for writers). And school also sucks a lot. But guess who graduated!! Finally free.  
> Hopefully now that it's summer I'll be able to update more for this series (going to try to have the next story up in a week) but I'm also going to be working so who knows.  
> Thank you for sticking with me and my awful updating schedule! I really appreciate all of the comments and kudos! Please subscribe to the series and I will work on getting the next story up ASAP.


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